IDL133 Season 3: Choosing a Mentor
Have you been searching for someone to support you through your work, life, and marriage? Who do you admire and trust to share wisdom with you? How should you pick the right person to learn from?
Hello and welcome! Today is a solo episode, and I’m discussing all things mentorship. This topic has been on my heart for a while, having first shared it with Jeremy Webber, a previous guest on the podcast. Today, I’m digging in deeper, discussing mentorship values, leadership, and lifestyle.
IN THIS EPISODE WE DISCUSS:
Choose a mentor that’s living where you want to go - 10:04
Choose a mentor that has shared values - 15:52
Choose mentors based upon their followers - 17:55
Choose a mentor who is time tested - 20:09
Choose a mentor who’s living what they teach - 23:14
Choose a mentor that’s living where you want to go
Look at their life and see how it is set up, their family, where they live, their friends, and what they do in their freetime. These are all important attributes to consider when you are choose a mentor.
“Understanding why they’re doing what they’re doing … is it just to sell a product? Or are they doing it to share an experience or a transformation they’ve had and it’s been magical in their life so they want to help others the same way? ”
Much like your friends, your mentor has a huge influence on your life, both intentionally and subtly.
The people that you look up to and want to imitate, make sure that they are good people to follow as examples, so look at their lives and get to know them to see if that’s true.
“If we look at your mentor, whatever they’re living [and] however they’re living … whatever their lifestyle looks like, if you spend time with them, that [lifestyle] is what you will gravitate to. ”
Choose a mentor that has shared values
If you are working closely or regularly with people and you often experience tension of frustration that you cannot seem to place, it could be because you and them have different values.
You need to have a set of similar principles with a group of people to work well together with peace because these shared values often give a space for healthy conflict, whenever potential conflict arises.
“When we align because of shared values, our differences become strengths. ”
What is important to you and the people within your circle of influence? What work are you doing together, and is there transformation within that work that you do? Where is your intentionality, choice, and integrity in your daily work and choices?
Choose mentors based on their followers
Mentors are also people that are farther along in their professional journey and may have accomplished more. Their networks will be larger, and perhaps they will have more clients and friends and followers.
See who also admires that person, and for what reason. Which people is this mentor bringing in, and how do they treat their audience?
“Who are they? What do they value? What success are they having? That isn’t always financial or material, maybe [it’s emotional].”
Choose a mentor who is time tested
Have they stood the test of time? Have they maintained, nurtured, and created success and transformation for a while?
“A quality mentor is someone who has gone through the rollercoaster of life and is riding with their hands in the air … and telling people to get on at the next stop. ”
It’s important for your mentor to have experienced challenges, ups and downs, and they have come out on the other side with more wisdom, strength, and compassion for others.
If a mentor can experience struggle without losing their commitment to their mission and vision, then you know that they are a solid force to lean on.
Choose a mentor who’s living what they teach
You need to pick a mentor that is practicing what they are preaching because that shows that they:
- Have integrity
- They have faith in the quality of their work
- They are disciplined and honesty
“Success is fleeting. Significance is long-lasting and the way to have significance is to live in a way that others can aspire to live as well. ”
Resources, books, and links mentioned in this episode:
BOOK | David Dodson - The Manager’s Handbook: Five Simple Steps to Build a Team, Stay Focused, Make Better Decisions, and Crush Your Competition
BOOK | Kim Scott - Radical Candor: Be a Kickass Boss Without Losing Your Humanity
BOOK | John Maxwell - How Successful People Think
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About the Impact Driven Leader Podcast
The Impact Driven Leader Podcast, hosted by Tyler Dickerhoof, is for Xillennial leaders who have felt alone and ill-equipped to lead in today's world. Through inspiring interviews with authors from around the world, Tyler uncovers how unique leadership strengths can empower others to achieve so much more, with real impact.
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