The Road Back to You
Maybe it is just me. I never thought about finding myself. I was who I was. It was the person I was made to be. I never really sought to change me or discover me.
Along the way, I had had enough.
I had gone through enough pain and angst from relationships that just didn’t jive. My relationships with some people were like peanut butter and chocolate. Others it was like oil and water.
In the fall of 2017, that all changed. I took my first 360 assessment, and here was the glowing result. IT IS ABOUT YOU! Now the hard part is I had no idea why it seemed to be that way. When I first took the Enneagram assessment, I discovered my number, 8. The much-maligned and distinctive 8, described as the Challenger or Protector.
The Enneagram result was the culmination of several other impactful assessments. All yielded the same type of person. A person who is strong like a lion. One who challenges and defends. Self- Confident, resourceful, assertive, passionate, determined, and energetic. Now those to me sound all great and positive. When those attributes are expressed in a healthy, supportive and encouraging manner, they are treasured.
However, there is an ugly side to every personality. For 8s, it’s intimidating, confrontational, ego-centric, angry, threatening, hard-hearted, vindictive, and hurtful. As I have learned, I need to be willing to put down my sword for me to be healthier. To open my arms and take off my armor. I have to be willing to let people see me for who I am, and in my heart, I want to serve and protect.
I had to stop putting my head down and pushing to get by. An attribute I can distinctly remember employing the moments after my brother died. I lost that easy-going, fun-loving nature and took on this hard, determined attitude. (As said to me by one of my childhood coaches!)
I vulnerably and willingly share this. Not only to be the healthiest 8 I can be but to be the healthiest leader I can be. The road I walked is the road laid out for me. You have a path in front of you. You have a journey. A ‘Road Back to You’ too.
To find the blind spots in front of me, I had to have people willing to care about me. People willing to link arms with me. People willing to grow with me.
I want to encourage you. There are those people here for you. It can be hard to find. It can be hard to find people who have similar values, goals, desires and challenges.
That is why I started the Impact Driven Leader Community. To help other leaders get healthy too!
